WHY EVERYONE WANTS YOU TO FUCK UP

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Excerpt

(BY JON WESTENBERG)

"People like pointing to the failures of
others as a reason for them to never
try anything and remain safely
planted in their comfort zone.

Everyone wants you to fuck
up because:

It takes the pressure off
them and redeems their
shitty life choices.

Most people won’t take risks or strike
out on their own. Not everyone has
to, not everyone should. But instead
of being honest about the fact that
they just don’t want to do it or they
aren’t suited to that kind of work, a
lot of people try to hide behind this
idea that they’re making the right
decision based on good, solid
evidence.

"The flip side of that is when you’re
successful, after taking a risk and
doing something that you believe in, it
throws a sharp light on the people
who never make the choice to do
that. It’s a big case study in favour of
leaping into the unknown, when what
they really want is a well documented
reason why they took the best path.

…and If you didn’t fail, it
could mean they did.

It’s easy to forget that when someone
succeeds, it doesn’t mean everyone
else failed in any way. I’m
particularly prone to this; I used to
look at people younger than me who
had achieved more and feel as though
I had missed out on an opportunity in
some way. I’ve mentioned my
compulsive comparing before –
looking up the age of Steve Jobs or
Bill Murray on Wikipedia and using it
to measure my achievements at that
age.

"Every win is a positive though. Every
time someone you know makes it
with their dream, their project or
their start-up, it’s awesome. It’s
another element of success in your
network. Is that going to help you?
Probably not. But it’s an example of
someone taking a risk and winning,
and a reason why you should do the
same.

The exceptions to all this are going to
be incredible. They’ll be people who
honestly believe in you and want you
to have a win, the kind of people who
will sacrifice their own shit just to
help you get it together. I’ve met very
few people like that, but I tend to
show my appreciation as much as
possible.

When everyone else wants you to
fuck up, they’ll be there rooting for
you. Oh, and you should probably be
one of those people. Don’t be an ass-
hole who wants everyone else to fail.